Assistant Manager Kim Hates Idols
SS Chapter 31: Lack of Individuality
Day/Night Mode:
Change Font Size:
TL: FoodieMonster007
Preparing for his solo debut was an arduous path for Jeong Seongbin, one he walked for the first time. He felt a hopelessness he hadn't experienced since his trainee days, not knowing if he was going the right way or how much further he had to go.
He was not as anxious as he was back then. Instead, the pressure was much greater.
I want to do well.
But what am I good at?
This feeling was different from his past self's lack of confidence and low self-esteem. It was closer to a lack of self-analysis.
Making a spArk album usually followed a routine. First, Kim Iwol established a rough concept and image. He produced a reference page, like a collage of images on a single sheet. This was their current, most time-efficient method, as the producers now understood each other well enough to communicate with just that. Lee Cheonghyeon then took the page and wrote the songs.
Once the final songs were ready, the planning team held an idea meeting based on the reference page and Kim Iwol's keywords. After Kim Iwol confirmed the plan, the dance line created the choreography. The company prepared the album art and music video shoot. They recorded until the jacket photo storyboards and choreography were finished. The basic framework always remained the same, though the order and details sometimes changed.
In this process, Jeong Seongbin's role was mainly to check if the final product deviated too much from the team's color. He also ensured the members did not feel overwhelmed. To borrow Kim Iwol's expression, the leader's job was more of an office role than a field one.
Calling it just 'because he's a vocalist' would be a misstatement. Park Joowoo was also a main vocalist, but his influence on an album was noticeable. The overwhelming skill gap couldn't be ignored, but it was true even as an idol where everyone sang divided parts. Listening to 『speaker』 or 『An Unspeakable Story』 revealed the unique color of Park Joowoo's vocal tone and taste.
Lee Cheonghyeon's songs were distinctly his own. His songs seemed to follow the K-pop formula, yet they possessed a dazzling brilliance or majestic quality, like a grand natural landscape.
Choi Jeho and Kang Kiyeon had many similarities, but they showed distinctly different tendencies when creating choreography. Even an outsider could look at the finished draft and tell who made it.
So, what 'Jeong Seongbin-like' elements existed in their past title tracks? It was not just about handling high notes and dancing in his spot. It was about something that would make someone think, 'This is totally a Jeong Seongbin production!' the moment they heard it.
Jeong Seongbin had pondered this for a long time. An idol's virtue was to prioritize the team over the individual. Jeong Seongbin learned this harsh truth from two teachers: his long trainee life and Kim Iwol. No one forced him to make sacrifices, but he rarely asserted his own musical opinions.
It was the same during IDC. He worried about finding outfits with limited resources or safely getting their ill eldest member on stage to boost his confidence. He did not worry about the musical aspects.
When Kim Iwol asked what kind of song he wanted for their comeback, Jeong Seongbin just answered diligently. He had many things to worry about besides music, so his self-reflection was always pushed aside.
This did not mean he was disappointed or dissatisfied. Jeong Seongbin liked Kim Iwol's concepts and Lee Cheonghyeon's songs. He was satisfied, so he did not object. If he had felt there was a problem, he would have commented.
Thankfully, his idol life flowed smoothly because of his capable colleagues who always gave him the best parts. The members finding their own stability also gave him a great sense of security.
Then, suddenly, Jeong Seongbin had to make all the choices. The news of his solo debut came like a bolt from the blue. To make matters worse, he received an assignment.
"A solo project is tailored entirely to the artist. Unlike when you're promoting as a team, you'll be on stage alone and singing the entire song. You need to consider this well and establish your own unique style."
As fate would have it, UtopiA was famous for prioritizing a singer's individuality over marketability, even back when it was called UA.
This was probably why a talent like Park Joowoo had walked right in on his own. For Jeong Seongbin, however, it only doubled his predicament.
Reviewing his seniors' cases brought no sudden epiphany. His most trusted friend offered some gentle advice, but it did not quite scratch the itch.
So, Jeong Seongbin hesitantly went to see a great senior artist. Yuur had come to the office to prepare for the group's comeback and handle company business, but he kindly made time for Jeong Seongbin. Jeong Seongbin was incredibly nervous in front of the senior artist, who laughed heartily after hearing his story.
"I wonder if I can give you better advice than Iwol. He's a guy with so many ideas, and more importantly, he knows you, Seongbin, much better than I do. Do you still need my advice?"
Jeong Seongbin nodded. The answer that came back was concise.
"Instead of the position of leader, it'll be helpful to think about the things you've built up to become one. You can't gain nothing from playing boss to your peers."
"Pardon?"
"If you don't get it, ask Iwol again. I'm worried I'll get a long text for meddling too much with someone else's little brother."
"Iwol isn't like that!"
"He's like that every day. Do you know how much he complained to me when the company offered you a director position?"
The hastily arranged meeting ended. The good-natured Jeong Seongbin did not relay the shocking exposé to Kim Iwol. Kim Iwol, however, immediately understood Yuur's cryptic praise.
"That's right. Any leader would think, 'I have to be a role model for the members.' You also always try to lead by example. A person can't be good at everything, but you probably feel you have to be above average in dance. There's this atmosphere where you can't be the one to miss the camera, even if you can't catch another member's mistake."
"Not to mention your main skill, singing."
"Well…"
"When that accumulates, you really do become good at everything. All the hard work becomes a part of you. You might have intended to find your specific strengths, but for someone who lacks nothing, the ability to do anything is the greatest advantage, isn't it? And isn't that the unique strength you were looking for?"
Kim Iwol's words made Jeong Seongbin recall an old memory. A flash of his trainee days passed by. He had drifted in the low ranks despite his long training period because he lacked a single, distinct, outstanding skill.
"In a team where the comparison group is high-class, having hexagonal stats is something to be proud of. Go out there thinking your very existence is a weapon, because you'll be the best wherever you go."
Did his past self have the confidence to become someone who could do anything?
He passed through days when just overcoming tasks was overwhelming, striving to become a leader his colleagues could trust. To that Jeong Seongbin, Kim Iwol's encouragement felt like a signal that he was ready for the next stage.
"He must have caught on to your worries right away since he's in the same position. You chose the right person for advice. Is my presence slowly fading? I guess you don't need an older brother who just makes mistakes…"
"If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have even been able to interpret what the senior artist said."
"That's something that just comes with experience."
Jeong Seongbin could laugh comfortably at Kim Iwol's jest. After that, his hesitation diminished.
He was knowledgeable in various genres and knew well what styles suited his vocal tone.
He had countless references in his head and could pull out any number of successful cases. Jeong Seongbin had these talents from the beginning. Once he focused only on 'what he wanted to show' and formed an outline, the path became clear.
This much… I can definitely do.
Among the success stories that felt like they belonged to someone else, few seemed impossible due to a 'lack of ability.'
His taste was not extremely niche, either. Jeong Seongbin had grown enough to instinctively discard trivial things and choose the best. Just as Kim Iwol said, it was because he had the experience.
Experience was what allowed him to so easily cross a barrier that once seemed impossible.
At last, Jeong Seongbin made a choice. He could now decide what kind of image he wanted to reveal. His solo album was completed that way.
A second chance might not come, depending on the results. He might not have made the choice that everyone around him believed in.
Still, he had created a result he would regret the least. To wish for more than this would be greedy.
Jeong Seongbin carefully opened the album. He wished the members were by his side. The reassurance from their familiar clamor was indescribable.
But even if they were physically apart, they were surely watching him. Weren't they leaving chats or writing on the fan platform the moment his name was mentioned?
So he had to show a confident side. Not out of a sense of duty, but with the pride of being the first one up to bat.
With a CLICK, the inside of the album box was revealed.
This time, Jeong Seongbin's album was produced in two versions, a limited edition and a standard edition. The standard edition mockup had been revealed in detail beforehand. The live broadcast revealed the limited edition album for the first time, which would only be produced once. Our leader, to his credit, didn't cause a huge disaster by making it a limited quantity release while I was away.
When Jeong Seongbin opened the limited edition album case, a rugged cassette tape sat where a CD would normally be. The limited edition's contents had been described, but some parts were hidden, including a secret item. That tape was the main one.
Since it was a limited edition, I had considered going big by including a CD player or even a retro My-My style device. However, Jeong Seongbin had a clear picture in his head and specifically chose the tape. He had bought a bunch of reference tapes from the antique market the day he bought a candlestick. The vintage stickers on the tape were also designed using colors from the album's color chip.
The photobook cover was also uniquely decorated. It was not the retro style of food brands or fashion magazines, nor was it anti-design. It truly felt like an old object. Specifically, a vintage 'Made in Korea' product, not something from overseas.
Was he aiming for nostalgia?
It was not a bad route. It was not exceptionally new, but it suited Jeong Seongbin well. I thought it could have been more challenging for his first independent step, but if it was what he wanted… I told him to do as he wished.
However, there was one fact I had momentarily overlooked.
No matter how prudent and diligent his personality, Jeong Seongbin was also a member of spArk who had been through thick and thin.
And among them, the leader who stood at the very front.
A guy like that would never quietly walk only the safe path. When Jeong Seongbin revealed the music video, I realized what a terrible whiner that talented guy had been.