Assistant Manager Kim Hates Idols
SS Chapter 94: The World's Best Photographer Competition (5)
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TL: FoodieMonster007
"What sin did I commit to deserve this sight? How did I raise you? I dressed you only in the prettiest things, prayed day and night for you to become more beautiful, and was thankful that your beauty was always with me like oxygen. I was so sincere that not a single Sparkler could deny my devotion…"
A stream of complaints poured from my mouth.
"You haven't even seen the photo yet, hyung."
"If I see it, I might actually faint."
I was serious. I was already feeling a little dizzy. It was definitely because of the damn magic eye-inducing jacket and the vest that was clearly meant to mock people.
It was twice as infuriating to see the attempt to mix a low-saturation yellow with a pale yellow, as if aiming for a tone-on-tone look. If you were going to do this, at least get rid of the red pattern that looks like a poison dart frog!
"The photo! Where's the photo?"
Kang Kiyeon cried out desperately. Judging by his face, he seemed to be just as lost in chaos as I was.
Even amidst the pandemonium, Choi Jeho did not bat an eye. As the cause of this whole mess, he looked at the screen with a placid expression.
In the short silence, I heard the click from the staff member who had received his signature.
The background was familiar. It was the action school Choi Jeho attended. Mattresses used for practicing stunts were laid out in a long, straight line on the floor.
Everything was dark, with only a single ray of light shining down on Lee Cheonghyeon. In the middle of it all, Lee Cheonghyeon was striking poses and walking like a model.
"It's a Fashion Week runway concept."
The great artist added an explanation.
It was easy to understand when I imagined the events that luxury brands hold each season. The news photos of models wearing baffling outfits that make you think, 'People pay money for clothes like that?' had this exact feel.
It was a perfect explanation that made me understand the profound coordination, the gaze that was too good for the clothes, and the living wrinkles of the fabric.
However, I could not suppress my fury. The sharp focus that captured a moving subject without any blur, the artistic style, and the perfect proportions did nothing to quell my anger.
If anything, the realistic runway-like recreation only fanned the flames. If he had such artistic sense, could he not have catered to the common folk's level a little more! Instead of asserting his presence with high-end fashion that let his experimental spirit bloom!
"May I cry for a bit?"
I asked, holding onto my last shred of sanity.
Choi Jeho replied nonchalantly, "Go ahead."
I picked up the blanket Lee Cheonghyeon had been wrapped in, buried my face in it, and wailed without tears. The hands of my colleagues patting my shoulders felt warm.
After the destructive photo reveal, spArk took a moment for a screen adjustment. It would probably air for about two seconds in the final content, but in reality, we needed about ten minutes to cool the heat from our faces.
"Teacher, are you able to present now?"
Lee Cheonghyeon, whose position had changed from presenter to audience member, asked with a cackle. It was one of the first times I had ever been this drained before a presentation.
From my days as a business student with back-to-back presentations to my life as a company employee, I had never felt burdened by a presentation. Now, I wanted to quit everything, presentation and all, as long as it was not this photoshoot.
"Yes, I'm planning to wrap this up quickly and go to the hospital."
"Oh dear."
At Lee Cheonghyeon's sympathetic reaction, Park Joowoo bit his lip. A furtive glance to my side showed that my partner, Jeong Seongbin, was not much different.
The usual nagging about how he could bite his lip while wearing glow lip tint did not come out today. I dragged my exhausted body forward and began to explain the planning intention behind 'Decorating Jeong Seongbin'.
"…I believe a man with good vibes should have this kind of atmosphere. Our mission wasn't 'A man with difficult vibes', was it?"
Then I shot a fierce glare at Choi Jeho. His Majesty, the Center Emperor, did not pay any mind to the glares of the common folk. I will definitely have to start a revolution in the near future.
My subject received favorable reviews. The consensus was that it fit the creator's intent.
Which meant, Lee Cheonghyeon could have also become a slyly handsome man who fit the creator's intent.
"This is all I've prepared. Please give lots of interest and love to Seongbin, the last warmth of spArk and a benevolent leader who embraces the members with love."
"Sounds like a campaign speech."
A round of applause erupted. I bowed politely and passed the prop microphone to Jeong Seongbin.
"The last model looks very mature!"
Lee Cheonghyeon said, raising his hand. Laughter broke out among the staff members. I could not bring myself to say that Mr. Jeong Seongjun had given me regressor fashion.
"To be honest, when I heard this mission, I really agonized over it a lot…"
Jeong Seongbin began with difficulty. He truly looked deep in thought.
I had to use all my willpower as his partner to suppress the laugh that was about to escape.
"Everyone, what do you feel is Iwol-hyung's public image?"
The prop microphone turned toward the seated members.
"Isn't 'dignified madman' the most famous one?"
"That one evolved a bit for slanderous purposes."
"A weird but professional idol…?"
"Isn't he the idol discipline enforcement squad?"
Somehow, they were all filled with a suspicious energy. It was bitter, but they were all things I had seen frequently on social media, so I had no room to argue.
"That's right."
"That's right?"
But if you, Jeong Seongbin, agree with them, does that not make the picture look strange?
Flustered, my head turned reflexively. Unlike me, Jeong Seongbin was perfectly calm.
"But the impression is quite different when we talk about his visuals. Even while hearing he's the idol scene's dean of discipline, when concept photos are released, he's called 'darkly handsome' or 'decadently handsome', right? And the Sparklers really love that side of him."
"……"
I suddenly felt awkward. The poor, kind-hearted guy. He did not even know that was just an illusion created by photo editing and fan adoration…
"I'm certain that if hyung just spoke a little less, he would have established a new axis for spArk's 'cold handsome' type."
"Is that supposed to be an insult?"
"It means that my feelings when I see you screaming while monitoring were the same as your feelings when you were tormented by the sight of model Cheonghyeon."
"You're saying it was that disastrous?"
Jeong Seongbin just smiled in response. As if spArk's 'cold handsome' color would have changed just because I kept my mouth shut.
We would have just gone from the Northern Grand Duke group, led by the Emperor Fox, to a group of dried-up, world-weary office workers. There is already a lot of public opinion wondering why we do not seem like idols at all.
"So, the 'Iwol-hyung with good vibes' that I prepared is 'Celebrity Kim Iwol'."
In the photo Jeong Seongbin displayed, I was just about to get out of a van. One arm was resting on the car's doorframe, and one foot was on the ground to exit the vehicle.
The sunlight reflected off my wax-styled hair and the unique material of my double coat, making it look like I was being hit by camera flashes. It seemed Jeong Seongbin, who had gotten out first, had pressed the shutter while I was looking around the filming location.
"Ugh… don't I look like I'm trying too hard?"
Just looking at it made me blush. In response to my reaction, the spArk guys were busy snickering.
It would have been better to have a big commotion and move on like with Lee Cheonghyeon. They were all just thinking about teasing me.
"That's just because we're so worn down by your nagging… When Iwol-hyung is heading to work or during promotions, he does have that kind of image."
"Iwol-hyung's preference is for everything to be 'natural', right? Like with Seongbin-hyung's photo earlier. He doesn't like things that look artificially staged, so he tends to take selfies and vlogs in a natural atmosphere, but honestly, when the cameras are off, just looking at hyung, he gives off that vibe a lot."
Kang Kiyeon and Lee Cheonghyeon cast their votes of agreement with Jeong Seongbin. With deep concern, I asked if they meant I usually seemed pretentious. Fortunately, I was told that was not the case.
"I told you during our first impressions. Based on appearance alone, you're closer to this photo…"
Park Joowoo hammered in the final nail. No matter how I looked at it, the me in the photo looked like a considerable jerk.
To think my impression was not 'friendly neighbor Mr. Kim Iwol'. The fact that my 'Grim Reaper' nickname was not because of the ghostly SYSTEM but due to my pure physical appearance made me feel like crying, something I had held back even after seeing Lee Cheonghyeon's runway.
Besides, it did not look very idol-like. From the start, Jeong Seongbin had not ordered a trendy style from Mr. Jeong Seongjun. In his explanation, he used the expression 'Celebrity' Kim Iwol, not 'Idol' Kim Iwol.
It gives me goosebumps to describe my own photo this way, but it seemed the kid wanted to make me look like someone accustomed to a barrage of camera flashes.
I completely understood how embarrassed Kang Kiyeon must have felt. I desperately looked away from the photo.
"And although I got this by chance, there's one more photo I really like, so I brought it along."
While my back was about to melt from a cold sweat, Jeong Seongbin showed no signs of finishing his presentation. It was driving me crazy.
"There's a content cheat code that works worldwide. Babies, or funny videos, or…"
As soon as he spoke, the photo changed. There I was, squatting down with my coat tails tucked under my knees to avoid dirtying someone else's coat, holding my phone.
On the phone's screen and in the corner of the frame was a cheese-colored cat smaller than my forearm.
"…Animals!"
Jeong Seongbin exclaimed proudly. Before we started filming, I had seen a cute passing cat and was wholeheartedly taking pictures to post on BubblePop.
I had no idea I was also being photographed from behind.
The gallery went wild for the yellow cat. It did not take long for the pretentious Mr. Kim to transform into the stray-cat-loving Mr. Kim.
To be honest, Mr. Kim was completely ignored as everyone gathered to look at the cat.
After the commotion died down, at the very end of the shoot, we received a note. Jeong Seongbin unfolded the mission paper as our representative, revealing a shocking message.
A little surprise for Sparkler! Please change your BubblePop profile picture to today's 'shot of a lifetime' until the day this episode is uploaded!
I can say with certainty that I had never given such a heartbreaking spoiler in my life.
However, what made me the saddest was not my photo that made me look like an ajusshi being revealed to the world before I had a chance to explain…
"Should I crop the top half to create curiosity, or the bottom half to attract attention?"
…It was the fact that Lee Cheonghyeon, who had become the frontrunner of the fashionable line, would have his image spread far and wide.
The day of 'Taking a Nice Photo of spArk', which left only scars, thus came to a close.