Assistant Manager Kim Hates Idols
SS Chapter 21: The Chaotic Self-Produced Content Diary (3)
Day/Night Mode:
Change Font Size:
TL: FoodieMonster007
『'It's an old saying, 'The brushwood burns out, but the fire is passed on'. It means to welcome a new fire made from new wood to replace the old fire with each changing season. To commemorate the successful launch of our first comeback… no. Our first project of the year, I wrote this hoping our customers would also have a meaningful New Year!』
A kind explanation followed. No wonder the kid had furrowed his brow and written so intently. His solemnity had a reason.
『Bin: And on the inside, a heartfelt message of gratitude…』
『Topi: The visuals look pretty seditious. Is it really a message of gratitude?』
Kim Iwol asked, pointing at the densely packed letters inside the t-shirt.
Jeong Seongbin strongly denied it and insisted the shirt contained only pure affection. Honestly, from the looks of it, Kim Iwol's claim seemed much more plausible.
『Bin: I'm not good at drawing, so I did my best with what I'm confident in, my handwriting!』
He said it humbly, though admitting he was bad at drawing did not seem very humble. To Won Chaehee, however, it looked quite decent.
In a world overflowing with terrible handwriting, Jeong Seongbin's marker lettering was excellent. Comparing it to others' would be rude. He might have learned calligraphy from his younger sibling, who was reportedly an oriental painting major.
『Kewpie: Aren't both Judy and you being too stingy with the material costs?』
『Nana: Is this a restaurant? For us to be cutting costs. Let's just say we focused on functionality.』
『Yeoni: Isn't the function just the same as a regular shirt?』
『Judy: It's the thought that counts, the thought…!』
『Topi: Who's going to know if you only put your heart into it? Sincerity comes from money, isn't that our company motto? It's also suspicious that you two who joined at the same time have similar designs.』
『Bin: Sometimes, there are things money can't buy. I'm truly and sincerely wishing for our customers' good fortune!』
『Judy: That's right, and I at least attached a doll…!』
『Bin: Judy?』
When one person threw out a comment, a hundred flew back. Traitors even emerged from within the same team. Everyone seemed deeply attached to the t-shirts they had made less than thirty minutes ago.
『Yeoni: Can a company motto be that capitalistic?』
Amid the chaos, Kang Kiyeon sharply pointed out the core issue. However, no one was listening.
『Nana: Then let's see what you made.』
『Kewpie: I'm confident.』
Lee Cheonghyeon stood up triumphantly.
The fabric in Lee Cheonghyeon's hands was no longer the white t-shirt it started as. It now had a much higher proportion of other colors, like orange. Gold sequins and beads were delicately attached, glittering yellow whenever the shirt wrinkled.
『Bin: I don't think it's that unique. Other than being a bit more flashy, I don't see any advantage that differentiates it from Judy's flame t-shirt.』
『Nana: I'm not really sorry to say this, but didn't you model for our company's products? Why is your aesthetic sense…』
『Kewpie: It's shiny, impressive, and its identity is clear at a glance. Why doesn't everyone understand the design's intention?』
Despite the flood of criticism, Lee Cheonghyeon was not discouraged. Kang Kiyeon, who had been staring blankly at his colleague's work, could not hide his dismay and asked.
『Yeoni: …This is giving me a lot to think about, but we're not being grouped as a team of three like this, are we?』
『Kewpie: Why would you say something so hurtful?』
『Topi: Yeoni, are you ashamed of us?』
The overwhelming visuals caused an internal rift. The sight of them helping each other dip straws in soapy water was gone. Judging by how things were going, it would not have been strange if Kang Kiyeon blew soap bubbles at Lee Cheonghyeon's face like firing a bubble gun.
Poor Kang Kiyeon could not withstand the torment from both Kim Iwol and Lee Cheonghyeon and stood up from his seat. He unfurled a t-shirt with colorful pieces of felt attached to the front in a 2x3 array. Each piece of felt was cut into the shape of a palm.
『Kewpie: What are these palms in this pop-art-like arrangement?』
『Yeoni: Please give me a chance to explain first.』
『Nana: We haven't said anything, and you're already explaining?』
Jeong Seongbin and Park Joowoo desperately tried to hold back their laughter. Park Joowoo's reddening face was shown in a huge close-up.
『Kewpie: Isn't that a penalty outfit?』
Lee Cheonghyeon, still nursing his hurt feelings, launched a fierce attack.
Suddenly, the Sparkler who was supposed to win the event prize became the one tasked with carrying out a penalty.
『Judy: Did you cut out the tracings of our palms from earlier…?』
Along with Park Joowoo's question, archive footage appeared. A clip played of Kang Kiyeon scurrying between the seats, holding out felt to the members while everyone was engrossed in making their t-shirts.
『After sketching along the shape of the members' palms』
『Cut and paste to complete!』
『(Proud)』
Completely unfitting pink captions and flower drawings appeared next to Kang Kiyeon's face as he stared intently at the t-shirt with a glint in his eyes.
『Yeoni: When our customers come to fan signs, they often ask to interlock fingers or compare hand sizes.』
『Topi: What kind of company holds a fan sign as a customer event?』
『Yeoni: …We hold an in-person employee service as a raffle prize event!』
His improvisation was brilliant. Kim Iwol crossed his arms with a satisfied smile. To Won Chaehee's eyes, however, all she could see were his well-defined forearms, accentuated by the tightened leather straps.
『Bin: So you've created a promotional item that allows users to gauge the hand sizes of all employees by understanding their needs. I didn't want to admit it, but I admit it.』
『Yeoni: …Kewpie, can I have some of those soap bubbles.』
『Kewpie: No matter how horizontal our team's hierarchy is, who blows bubbles during a meeting?』
『Nana: Is 'po' the Hanja [泡] for bubble?』
『Judy: Cheonghyeon is smart…』
『Topi: Not Cheonghyeon, Kewpie.』
『Judy: Kewpie is smart…』
The killing point was that he had even stuffed the palms with cotton for a plush feel. Despite Kang Kiyeon's strong resistance, the crooked stitching was clearly magnified. Kang Kiyeon's turn ended with a self-deprecating joke that it would fail quality inspection.
『Topi: It's finally my turn. I'll present quickly before the warmth of the t-shirt fades.』
『Kewpie: Warmth? Did you wear it or something?』
『Topi: Yes.』
『Kewpie: What?』
There was not even a hint of a smile on Kim Iwol's face. He was dead serious.
『Topi: I conducted a test for about thirty seconds, wearing the clean shirt straight out of the suitcase on my freshly showered body this morning. As a substitute for a warranty, I've taken and attached a proof shot.』
Kim Iwol held up a Polaroid. The photo showed the exact same t-shirt as the product on screen.
『Topi: Our customers have long preferred products with a history of actual use. You all remember how popular Nana's nameplate was at the last consumer meeting.』
It was about the charity auction held at a fan meeting. The legendary time when Choi Jeho ripped the name tag off his own school uniform.
Everything Kim Iwol said was right. Items personally worn by celebrities, like stage outfits, hats, and bags, became wannabe collectibles for fans. Even Won Chaehee herself had bought a case to store the mallu doll that Kim Iwol had sprayed with the perfume he used.
In an era where people buy clothes in the same size as their favorite athletes or singers out of pure fan devotion, even if they cannot wear them, a perfect-fit t-shirt from their ultimate bias? With a one-of-a-kind photocard included? His grasp of public sentiment was spot on.
『Bin: What's written on the front?』
Jeong Seongbin asked.
Kim Iwol stretched the shirt taut. Short sentences were written here and there, like a rolling paper.
『Topi: They're the lyrics to the company's CM song.』
spArk's fan song, 『The Third Letter』, was thus repurposed as a CM song. It was hard to know whether to laugh or be moved.
『Nana: You bought all those materials, and that's all for decoration?』
『Topi: Of course not.』
At Kim Iwol's words, Lee Cheonghyeon, who was sitting next to him, leaned back in his chair to check the back of the t-shirt. The other members stared in confusion at Lee Cheonghyeon, who burst into roaring laughter.
『Topi: I now present. The spArk stage outfit edition!』
『Tada-!』
Along with a large caption, dazzling jewels were revealed. It was not just jewels. There were chains in some places and number stickers plastered on others. It looked like a phone case sold in an underground shopping arcade.
『Judy: Where exactly is the stage outfit…』
『Topi: The moment you see this jersey number marking, doesn't it remind you of 『On A High Note』? And these flowers and pearl beads I attached have exactly the feel of the 『Bright』
music video. These white feathers also symbolize…』
『Bin: You attached all of this in such a short time?』
『Topi: All of it. By myself. Personally.』
The archive footage appeared again. Once he started working, Kim Iwol's hands, when played at 2x speed, moved almost like a machine as he attached parts to the t-shirt.
Even as Lee Cheonghyeon's sequins and Kang Kiyeon's felt scraps flew about from both sides, he remained unshaken and upright. In the midst of it all, he diligently filled the wide surface, even using tweezers to delicately position the pieces.
『Topi: Look at this delicate touch. Not just anyone can attach a gondola ornament to a shirt.』
『Nana: Usually, no one attaches it. How are you supposed to wear that?』
Despite Choi Jeho's rebuttal, Kim Iwol was unfazed. When he touched the gondola with his finger, the mini attraction ornament spun like a real amusement park ride. It was clear this was not meant to be worn.
『Topi: Can you feel the detail? Any customer who watched the 『With List』
season won't be able to help but love it.』
『Judy: I… I like 『With List』, but I'm not so sure.』
『Topi: How can that be?』
With a look of genuine bewilderment, Kim Iwol endlessly spun the gondola. Park Joowoo, whose eyes were trembling, ended up avoiding his hyung's clear gaze.
After the dazzling presentations, the raffle method for the t-shirts, made with care by the Yonggwang Electronics Entertainment Division, was announced. Choi Jeho unfolding his t-shirt with a benign impression, Park Joowoo winking with an energetic pose, Lee Cheonghyeon sitting upright like in a new recruit's profile picture, Kim Iwol resting his arm on a partition and making an "ending fairy" face, and Kang Kiyeon leaning back in his chair in a department head's pose were all fatally unnatural.
『Bin: We love you, our customers! We hope your day is filled with only good things!』
With a salesman's smile, Jeong Seongbin shouted the closing CS ment.
I guess I don't have to worry about them losing their initial passion just yet…!
Won Chaehee turned off the video, feeling a mix of slight joy and great bewilderment. Was it because her energy had been drained? She wanted to rest for just five minutes before applying for the event.